Question: I’ve posted in this group before and here’s my situation as it stands right now. I’m a highschool dropout from Stuyvesant Highschool in manhattan. I had a 70.75 average for the five semesters I completed. I scored 1540 on the SAT last May (800 verbal, 740 math) I want to study math/physics in college. Unfortunately I’ve been bumming around and working since last spring, and I haven’t taken the SAT iis yet. I found out today that I was a national merit semi-finalist (I probably won’t make finalist due to my low grades). I got a 5 on the BC Calculus exam sophomore year (I used to be 3-4 years ahead in math before I fucked myself over) and a 3 on the European History exam. The constant theme of my life is that I have never put any effort into anything for more than a week in my entire life. I have a GED.
I was admitted to Simons Rock College of Bard, but I applied late, so I can only go there for fall 2002. I want to go to a real college, but I don’t think I will get in. I had virtually no activities in highschool and I did nothing outside of school. No sports or clubs or anything like that. I don’t even think I could get a good recommendation from a teacher in school, since I never really got to know any of them. I was depressed throughout most of highschool and on and off medications. Wellbutrin sort of worked for me as an anti-depressant, and I was able to maintain a 90 average while on it, but I stopped taking it and got caught in another downward spiral.
How can I possibly get a college (please, no stupid posts saying “why don’t you go to community college for two years and transfer”) to accept me with my record? I don’t have anything to show, but I do think colleges should take a risk on me. I feel like I’m outside of the system and caught in the gears that run it. If only american colleges had admissions by examination, I would be all right, but they don’t, and instead try to determine the overall worth of a person by a means which make me look like the biggest loser. Maybe I am. Where do I apply? What do I do? I’m supposed to move out of my home by october 13th.
I’m thinking of applying to all the colleges that have sort of an alternative leaning (they are the only ones willing to take any risk on me). Here is a list:
Reed Bard Antioch (looked like shit from what I read about it)
Those are the only three I know of (the college counselor at my old school steered me towards them).
Other than that, how about: SUNY – a bunch of them CUNY – a bunch of them
I fear I won’t be accepted anywhere accept the lowest CUNYs.
I’m a good writer which will show in my essays, but is that enough to convey that I am an interesting and intelligent person, if it’s not backed by good recs or a transcript or even a list of activities? I have no idea where the time went, but I guess you could say I was doing random stuff. Depressed people tend to waste time. By the way, don’t let the 740 math fool you, I’m better than a 740, just not on that one sitting.
Thank you,
Answer: I’m a little older, and a permanent dropout who has been outside the system in some ways like yourself. I’ve seriously read your postings in this thread. I don’t know all the particulars or answers, but here are some ideas.
First, it seems you are addressing the issue of academic “risk” at face value. A “high risk student” begs an issue framed by politically influenced school administrators who cater to the rich parents and beautiful students – who seem to have an easier time getting in and through than the rest of us.
People’s values often are not adducible to positive form. If you didn’t participate in political or social groups in high school which were theme-focused, that does therefore not necessarily mean that you lack the values of the students who did. In fact, the students who did get the extra-curricular credentials on their college app forms could be a lot less conscientious than you about those very same themes.
You might start your study of the problem of college admissions in terms of contract law, a less traveled road for people your age. Pick up a law school textbook on contracts. You will find sections on consent, undue influence, mistake, fraud, etc which might inspire you to take a more critical look at the college admissions process. By studying some contract law, you will be taking more mature look at the admissions process than even the “successful” students who pranced into the elite universities without a thought. You can ask yourself questions like, “If I have to drop out of college, which I may be likeley to, will I be able to get out of the student loan obligations?”
Next, pick out a bunch of universities where you feel you would be comfortable at and therefore most likely be successful at. By all means avoid applying to “safety” schools and “bottom-up” community colleges if you don’t feel comfortable with the idea of going to one. Why would you feel comfortable anywhere if you don’t have a choice? Ask yourself again, “Assuming I will probably need to stop-out a couple times, is it a school which I would likely want to return to?” And of course, never be afraid to say “No” to all offers of admission if you would rather go to one which rejects you.
Your high test scores and precocious math education tells an important story. They say that you have had to achieve education *outside* the “educational” system you were brought up and immersed in. The fact is that people get good grades because there is nothing about their lives which seriously disrupts their focus on their academic work and relations with teachers.
People get admitted to elite schools for all the wrong reasons, including political ones. There would be little risk for the schools in making an exception in your case. It would be unfair to presume that they wouldn’t. So apply to them. If you don’t have the bucks, ask for fee waivers or fee reductions. Some schools have a “pre-application” requirement about having a high school diploma. If that requirement conflicts with your dropout-GED experience, ask them for a waiver of the high school diploma requirement. Beyond issues of contract law, schools are technically non-profit educational trusts which are obligated by law to fairly consider your requests and grievances. Include this newsgroup posting in your applications.
College education is pretty standardized in terms of the depth anyone gets in any particular subject. A four-year curriculum flies by very fast no matter where you go. Take a good look at the students when you visit their campuses. Don’t bother talking with them seriously about your problems. They will not stand up for you at the admissions office. The students you meet won’t want to be distracted with other people’s problems over school system personnel who cater to them, while at the same time kicking you in the face. If they feel they have advantages over you, they will not do anything which they feel might jeopardize them.
The differences between you and them? Like you they got their own high test scores. They also have their Bimmers and SUV’s, some their nice looking bodies, their wisdom teeth pulled, their free plane trips to the Bahamas and overseas, defensive parents, dermatologists, and their family pampering well beyond the age you were mistaught you should be “independent” and “adult”. The schools don’t have to worry about them or their parents paying their bills or embarrassing the schools in the employment market. Their elite admissions and graduation (and that of their parents) will be tickets to outrageously high paying jobs, employment security, and good sex.
Take a little comfort in the fact that all people your age are still adolescents and therefore not “complete” adults. We all mature at different rates in different ways. Even the “most adjusted” and “most mature” students will still have significant shortfalls in this respect. I hear that adolescence doesn’t end until you’re about 35. The one-dimensional incompleteness of adolescence is why you will not be getting adequate peer support from others in your age group. That is why some other posters here have flamed you. They do not know any better. When they get older, they still won’t be any better if their credentialism pays too well.
Unlike yourself, I personally don’t take any mental drugs. I’ve known a couple Stanford students who did while in school. They did OK academically, one I think was valedictorian (which had nothing to do with the drugs). But they personally felt much better after they stopped. I think my ragging on them helped.
And dude, I’m telling you all this to try to help build a little better world than the one I grew up in. Nobody would plug in for me the way I’m plugging in for you here. If some of the things I’ve said are off-the- mark or not the whole story, take it with a grain of salt. As I said, I don’t know all the particulars of your situtation.
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